Quotes from
Monty Python and the Holy Grail

The original quote, with slang   What does it mean?
First Peasant: Who's that there?
Second Peasant: I don't know... Must be a king.
First Peasant: Why?
Second Peasant: He hasn't got shit all over him.
First Peasant: Who's that there?
Second Peasant: I don't know... Must be a king.
First Peasant: Why?
Second Peasant: He isn't covered with feces.

Black Knight: None shall pass.
Arthur: What?
Black Knight: None shall pass.
Arthur: I have no quarrel with you, good Sir Knight, but I must cross this bridge.
Black Knight: Then you shall die.
Arthur: I command you as King of the Britons to stand aside!
Black Knight: I move for no man.
Arthur: So be it!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's left arm.

Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
Black Knight: 'Tis but a scratch.
Arthur: A scratch? Your arm's off!
Black Knight: No, it isn't.
Arthur: Well, what's that then?
Black Knight: I've had worse.
Arthur: You liar!
Black Knight: Come on you pansy!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's right arm.


Arthur: Victory is mine! We thank thee Lord, that in thy mercy...

Black Knight: No one can pass me.
Arthur: What?
Black Knight: No one can pass me.
Arthur: I have no quarrel with you, good Sir Knight, but I must cross this bridge.
Black Knight: Then you will die.
Arthur: I command you as King of the Britons to let me past!
Black Knight: I move for no man.
Arthur: So be it!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's left arm.

Arthur: Now stand aside, worthy adversary.
Black Knight: It's only a scratch.
Arthur: A scratch? Your arm is off!
Black Knight: No, it isn't.
Arthur: Well, what's that then?
Black Knight: I've had worse.
Arthur: You liar!
Black Knight: Come on you homosexual (derogatory)!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's right arm.


Arthur: I win! We thank you Lord, that in your mercy...

Black Knight: Come on then.
Arthur: What?
Black Knight: Have at you!
Arthur: You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but the fight is mine.
Black Knight: Oh, had enough, eh?
Arthur: Look, you stupid bastard, you've got no arms left.
Black Knight: Yes I have.
Arthur: Look!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound.
Arthur: Look, stop that.
Black Knight: Chicken! Chicken!
Arthur: Look, I'll have your leg. Right!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's leg.


Black Knight: Right, I'll do you for that!
Arthur: You'll what?
Black Knight: Come 'ere!
Arthur: What are you going to do, bleed on me?
Black Knight: I'm invincible!
Arthur: You're a loony.
Black Knight: The Black Knight always triumphs! Have at you! Come on then.

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's other leg.


Black Knight: All right; we'll call it a draw.
Arthur: Come, Patsy.
Black Knight: Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You yellow bastard! Come back here and take what's coming to you. I'll bite your legs off!

Black Knight: Continue.
Arthur: What?
Black Knight: Let's fight!
Arthur: You are indeed brave, Sir Knight, but I won.
Black Knight: Oh, had enough, have you?
Arthur: Look, you stupid offensive man, you've got no arms left.
Black Knight: Yes I have.
Arthur: Look!
Black Knight: Just a flesh wound.
Arthur: Look, stop that.
Black Knight: Coward! Coward!
Arthur: Look, I'll have your leg. Right!

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's leg.


Black Knight: Right, I'll do something bad to you for that!
Arthur: You'll what?
Black Knight: Come here!
Arthur: What are you going to do, bleed on me?
Black Knight: I can't be beaten!
Arthur: You're a crazy person.
Black Knight: The Black Knight always wins! Let's fight! Come on then.

Arthur cuts off the Black Knight's other leg.


Black Knight: All right; we'll say the fight was equal.
Arthur: Come, Patsy. (to his servant)
Black Knight: Oh, oh, I see, running away then. You cowardly offensive man! Come back here and take what you deserve to get. I'll bite your legs off!