Red: Okay, I'll talk. Ted Jones, he knows you witnessed the murder. He found your roach. He sent two guys over here--Budlofsky and Matheson. Two real big son of a bitches. They're basically out to kill you guys, and they're gonna kill me, too, unless I turn y'all over. So you guys are basically fucked.

Red: Okay, I'll talk. Ted Jones knows you witnessed the murder. He found the end of the marijuana cigarette you were smoking. He sent two men over here--Budlofsky and Matheson. They are two big dangerous men. They're goal is to kill you men, and they're going to kill me, too, unless I give you to them. So you are in a hopeless situation.

Dale: In case you haven't noticed--which you haven't, 'cause from what I can tell, you don't notice anything ever--we are not very functional when we're high.
Saul: Well, I don't know, man. I think I'm functioning right now. I was, like, stoned when I saved you with those slushies. What do you gotta say to that?
Dale: Well, that would be true if you had saved me. But you didn't save me. She was gonna help us, but you made things worse. Now we're wanted for all sorts of crazy shit!
Saul: Don't fucking get on my case, all right? Look, only reason I started selling pot is so I could put my bubbeh in a nice retirement home.

Dale: In case you haven't noticed--which you haven't, because from what I can tell, you don't notice anything ever--we are not very functional when we have smoked marijuana.
Saul: Well, I don't know if that is true, man. I think I'm functioning right now. I was high on marijuana when I saved you with those sweet frozen drinks. How do you respond to that?
Dale: Well, that would be true if you had saved me. But you didn't save me. She [the police officer] was going help us, but you made things worse. Now the police are looking for us because of the crazy illegal things we did!
Saul: Don't fucking [used for emphasis] start criticizing me, all right? Pay attention: the only reason I started selling marijuana is so I could put my grandmother in a nice retirement home.

Saul: You lied to me.
Red: I did. I lied big time to you.
Saul: Dale said that, that you didn't even have herpes and I said that you did.
Red: Honestly, like, from now on, just, like, from everything that we've gone through, from, like, seeing this fuckin' asshole's nuts smashed with my Daewoo, I want to be a better friend to you. I really am.
Saul: I fuckin' love you, dog. I fuckin' love you.
Red: I wanna be inside you, homes.

Saul: You lied to me.
Red: I did. I really lied to you.
Saul: Dale said that you didn't even have herpes and I said that you did.
Red: Honestly, from this moment, from everything that we've gone through, from seeing this fucking [used for emphasis] unpleasant man's testicles smashed with my Daewoo car, I want to be a better friend to you. I really do.
Saul: I really love you, friend. I really love you.
Red: I want to have sex with you, friend.